The B Word
25th September, 2004
Dear Friends
Last week a BBC series was trying to distil the essence of being British!
This is significant for an enterprise that includes in its title the ‘B’ word.
Highly rated qualities included pride, politeness and a sense of humour.
On reflection my appointment to this role was probably not predicated on the first two!
Have you ever wondered why we experience so much embarrassment when we see someone leaving the bathroom with either their zip at half mast or dress snagged in their underwear? These events are rarely revelatory but the illusion of exposure is an affront to pride. Observer politeness presents the dilemma of creating personal embarrassment as a solution to public ridicule. The tragedy is usually diffused to comedy through a sense of humour, which is one of God’s unique gifts to humanity.
It occurs to me that these same graces underlie some of our communication difficulties. We observe mannerisms and behavioural patterns in each other that contribute to unmentionable tensions as a result of pride. Cultural politeness results in denial and social fragmentation. Robert Burns penned the words ‘O would some power the giftie gie us, to see ourselves as others see us’. Maybe he could have suggested that the same power would enable us to resolve our differences with a sense of self deprecating humour.
Wouldn’t life be simple if we could guarantee shared laughter in response to help aimed at containing our own idiocy? Maybe we should declare a moratorium on defensiveness? Maybe we should ask euphemistically whether: ‘the fly is open’? Laughing ‘with’ rather than ‘at’ one another could be a whole lot of fun.
Thank you for your pride in serving, the politeness exercised in dealing with God’s fragile people and most of all the humour with which you forgive our limitations.
May God continue to bless
Yours truly,
Victor Pilmoor
Treasurer
“Great peace have they who love your law, and nothing can make them stumble. “
Psalm 119:165 (NIV)